My husband and I watched an interesting film, 'Le Weekend', this weekend (excuse the repetition!), starring the phlegmatic Jim Broadbent and the lovely Lindsay Duncan. This film is gentle and relatively slow-moving, but gives the viewer quite a lot to chew on.
Nick and Meg have been married for thirty years. They return to Paris, where they honeymooned, for their wedding anniversary in an attempt to reinvigorate their fading relationship. Things get off to a bad start when they find that the hotel they have booked (the one where they spent their honeymoon, of course), is not quite what they had hoped for -- shabby and run down, the bedrooms without a single view of any of the beautiful Paris landmarks. (I do wonder whether it is memory rather than the hotel which is letting them down -- and, of course, the fact that as you go up in years, your standards seem to rise at a similar rate!)
As the film unwinds and events play out, we see why their relationship is strained -- they are no longer physically intimate; Nick wonders whether Meg might be having an affair; Meg wants to enjoy herself and reinvent her life, whereas Nick is much more settled, only really wanting to be reassured that his wife still loves him. Despite their annoyances with one another, there is still something strong between them -- we see that they are capable of laughing and having fun together (successfully escaping from an expensive restaurant without paying the bill sees them running along the street together in stitches, every bit like a young, carefree couple).
Towards the end of the film, Meg makes a significant point. She explains how, one day when she was out with a friend, her mobile rang. When she hung up her friend asked her who was on the phone. 'Was it your lover?' she asked. 'You were laughing so much, having so much fun, that I thought it must be.' 'No,' Meg replied. 'It was my husband.'
And this, I think, is one of the fundamentals of a strong relationship. No matter what life throws at you, if you and your partner can laugh together and have fun, then you're still on track. It wasn't clear from the film whether Meg and Nick's relationship would survive in the long term, but it seemed to me that they were certainly still moving in the right direction.
26 July, 2014
19 July, 2014
A movie, and a concert in the abbey
We had an entertaining weekend last week.
Our youngest child was away at a sleepover and so we asked our oldest whether there was anything that she would like to do that her sister might not have enjoyed. She opted to go and see the film 'The Fault in Our Stars'. I had no idea in advance what I was going to see and assumed that it would be a kids' movie that I wouldn't much enjoy. I was wrong. It was a really interesting and moving story about two teenagers who have cancer and fall in love. It didn't end on a happy note. In fact, the whole film was pretty downbeat, really. But all three of us very much enjoyed it and were reduced to tears by the end. It's nice when your kids get to the age that they can show you really interesting stuff...
Then, on the Sunday (after the sleepover), all four of us went to see a classical concert at Abingdon Abbey. The abbey is fantastic--large parts of the original Medieval buildings remain standing and are used as a venue for events throughout the year. We are very lucky to have it on our doorstep.
A cultural couple of days all round!
Our youngest child was away at a sleepover and so we asked our oldest whether there was anything that she would like to do that her sister might not have enjoyed. She opted to go and see the film 'The Fault in Our Stars'. I had no idea in advance what I was going to see and assumed that it would be a kids' movie that I wouldn't much enjoy. I was wrong. It was a really interesting and moving story about two teenagers who have cancer and fall in love. It didn't end on a happy note. In fact, the whole film was pretty downbeat, really. But all three of us very much enjoyed it and were reduced to tears by the end. It's nice when your kids get to the age that they can show you really interesting stuff...
Then, on the Sunday (after the sleepover), all four of us went to see a classical concert at Abingdon Abbey. The abbey is fantastic--large parts of the original Medieval buildings remain standing and are used as a venue for events throughout the year. We are very lucky to have it on our doorstep.
A cultural couple of days all round!
12 July, 2014
Wonder Woman and Feminism
Last week I heard an entertaining piece on the Today programme which debated whether or not Wonder Woman is a feminist. This whole issue arose because David Finch, the artist who is taking over Wonder Woman for DC Comics, has said that he wants her to be "strong" but not "feminist". The two women interviewed on the Today programme were in no doubt that Wonder Woman is feminist. She is an Amazon, hence was raised by women in an all-female society, she runs her own business, she slit Superman's throat with her tiara. How could she not be feminist, they quipped?
My overriding memory of Wonder Woman, never having been a comic reader, is the 1970s TV series starring Lynda Carter, which I grew up watching. Now that was cool. But given the era, I don't think there was much emphasis on Wonder Woman's feminist side. Certainly, there was a lot of emphasis on her sexiness and there were an awful lot of dads (as well as sons) who fancied Lynda Carter rotten. But given the boob tube, shorts and knee-high boots worn by the gorgeous Lynda, rather than just drawn in a comic strip, who could blame them?
I don't think much has changed these days, either. You only need think of the utterly self sufficient but surprisingly scantily clad Lara Croft, or even the groan-worthy but addictive Xena: Warrior Princess TV series, to realise that, in the world of media at least, female strength is often painted hand-in-hand with sexiness.
And the same goes for (some) men too. The sister series to Xena: Warrior Princess, Hercules, starred the lovely Kevin Sorbo. Not only was he super strong, but his sexual image was all-important too. The long hair, the blistering smile, the muscles, the tight leather trousers, the sexy wristbands--all of this aimed to seduce the watcher.
So perhaps strength and sex simply are natural partners. Maybe we just do find someone--man or woman--who is in control, masterful, and their own person inherently attractive. And maybe the issue of feminism is irrelevant here, or a side issue at best.
05 July, 2014
Giffords Circus
We had a lovely, and rather unusual, birthday party for my ten year old last weekend. We took her, her older sister and three of her friends to see Giffords Circus.
Giffords is a small circus which tours Gloucestershire and the south west of England, setting up on local village greens. It was started ten years ago by Nell and Toti Gifford and is a little bit different from the other circuses that you can see in Britain. It is, I suppose, what you'd call traditional -- more like a travelling troupe than a Chinese State-style extravaganza-- and that's exactly what the Giffords were aiming for.
There are acrobats, fire jugglers, strong men, dancers, horse riders, a super-flexible gymnast... There's an absolutely brilliant clown -- the best I've seen -- not just hackneyed slapstick, but 'proper' funny. And there are various animals -- horses, dogs, doves, and even a turkey and a goose! The dogs, by the way, are dalmatians, which delighted my daughter, who is absolutely mad about dalmatians -- indeed anything spotty!
The show has an intimate, family feel. This is partly a facet of the small top, but it's also the fact that the performers clearly love what they do (we bumped into one of them in the loos, who remarked with a big smile on her face, 'It's not really work!'). You can also get a sense of just how hard it is to do the kinds of things that circus performers do -- one of the acrobats, who was trying to to do a backwards double somersault onto the shoulders of a tower of three of his fellows, missed first time. But they simply did it again, and it worked!
The show was beautifully produced -- very theatrical, excellent acting, gorgeous costumes. And the troupe is supported by a group of musicians who are extremely talented, including a singer with a fantastic operatic voice.
This was our first visit to Giffords Circus (I only found out about them because I happened to be flicking through a local magazine while I was waiting for my kids to have their hair cut), but I certainly don't think it will be our last. I'm already planning next year's outing!
Giffords is a small circus which tours Gloucestershire and the south west of England, setting up on local village greens. It was started ten years ago by Nell and Toti Gifford and is a little bit different from the other circuses that you can see in Britain. It is, I suppose, what you'd call traditional -- more like a travelling troupe than a Chinese State-style extravaganza-- and that's exactly what the Giffords were aiming for.
There are acrobats, fire jugglers, strong men, dancers, horse riders, a super-flexible gymnast... There's an absolutely brilliant clown -- the best I've seen -- not just hackneyed slapstick, but 'proper' funny. And there are various animals -- horses, dogs, doves, and even a turkey and a goose! The dogs, by the way, are dalmatians, which delighted my daughter, who is absolutely mad about dalmatians -- indeed anything spotty!
The show has an intimate, family feel. This is partly a facet of the small top, but it's also the fact that the performers clearly love what they do (we bumped into one of them in the loos, who remarked with a big smile on her face, 'It's not really work!'). You can also get a sense of just how hard it is to do the kinds of things that circus performers do -- one of the acrobats, who was trying to to do a backwards double somersault onto the shoulders of a tower of three of his fellows, missed first time. But they simply did it again, and it worked!
The show was beautifully produced -- very theatrical, excellent acting, gorgeous costumes. And the troupe is supported by a group of musicians who are extremely talented, including a singer with a fantastic operatic voice.
This was our first visit to Giffords Circus (I only found out about them because I happened to be flicking through a local magazine while I was waiting for my kids to have their hair cut), but I certainly don't think it will be our last. I'm already planning next year's outing!
28 June, 2014
What it means to be British -- a philosophical question
The British Social Attitudes survey has been in the news recently. Not surprisingly, in view of the growth of the hard right in the UK, it appears that our social attitudes are hardening as well as our political ones. This is particularly so in relation to 'Britishness'. Thus, 95 per cent of respondents believed that someone had to speak English to be British; 77 per cent thought that it was important to have lived for most of one's life in Britain in order to be British; and 74 per cent agreed that it was important to have been born in Britain to be British.
This whole debate is, of course, an example of the philosophical puzzle of essentialism -- what is it that makes something the thing that it is; or what is its essence. This is a notoriously difficult problem in philosophical circles. Is something's essence just one quality (being born in Britain), or is it a combination of qualities (being born in Britain, speaking English, having lived most of one's life in Britain). And, if the latter, is it possible to remove some of those qualities, but for the thing still to retain its essence (can someone who speaks English, was born in Britain, but who has not lived here for most of their life qualify as British?). And, if you go on removing qualities, at what point does the thing lose its essence? The classic philosophical example is that of a ship which gradually, over time, has its planks replaced until, eventually, none of the original planks remain (the ship is only made up of replacement planks). Is this still the same ship, or has it lost its essence? (One might ask the same question of human beings, whose cells are continually replaced throughout their lives. Is an individual still the same person at the end of their life as they were at the start?)
My husband and I were discussing the British Social Attitudes survey at home. After some thought, my husband suggested that what made someone truly British was the fact that they considered themselves British. But I'm not convinced by this. Take someone who was born outside Britain, visited on holiday, and decided to stay because they loved the country so much and felt so much at home here. For these reasons, that person might consider themselves to be British. But I don't really think we'd want to say that that person actually was British just because they felt they were British -- at least, not until they had lived here for a numbers of years, could speak the language well, etc., etc.
This whole debate is, of course, an example of the philosophical puzzle of essentialism -- what is it that makes something the thing that it is; or what is its essence. This is a notoriously difficult problem in philosophical circles. Is something's essence just one quality (being born in Britain), or is it a combination of qualities (being born in Britain, speaking English, having lived most of one's life in Britain). And, if the latter, is it possible to remove some of those qualities, but for the thing still to retain its essence (can someone who speaks English, was born in Britain, but who has not lived here for most of their life qualify as British?). And, if you go on removing qualities, at what point does the thing lose its essence? The classic philosophical example is that of a ship which gradually, over time, has its planks replaced until, eventually, none of the original planks remain (the ship is only made up of replacement planks). Is this still the same ship, or has it lost its essence? (One might ask the same question of human beings, whose cells are continually replaced throughout their lives. Is an individual still the same person at the end of their life as they were at the start?)
My husband and I were discussing the British Social Attitudes survey at home. After some thought, my husband suggested that what made someone truly British was the fact that they considered themselves British. But I'm not convinced by this. Take someone who was born outside Britain, visited on holiday, and decided to stay because they loved the country so much and felt so much at home here. For these reasons, that person might consider themselves to be British. But I don't really think we'd want to say that that person actually was British just because they felt they were British -- at least, not until they had lived here for a numbers of years, could speak the language well, etc., etc.
Our Tesco shopping delivery interrupted our social attitudes
discussion. While I was waiting for my husband to bring the last empty crate to
the door, I struck up a conversation with the driver. What was our conversation
about? The weather, of course. 'That's what it is to be truly British,' my
husband quipped, after the driver had pulled away. 'Being able to talk to
anyone at length about the weather!'
How true.
21 June, 2014
Sofas...and an exhibition
We had a fun day out in London last weekend. There were a couple of things that we wanted to do there--order a new sofa and see an exhibition at the V&A--so we decided to kill two birds with one stone.
We'd already decided that we would order our new sofa from sofa.com. We'd seen their adverts in various publications, gone online to look at their website, and decided that this was the supplier for us. Designs and fabrics that we liked, an unfailingly good customer service ethic (even down to being prepared to take your sofa back if you decide that you don't like it once it arrives, for whatever reason), and five star reviews all round. But we didn't feel comfortable buying without seeing in the flesh, so we needed to make the trip to the sofa.com warehouse in Chelsea.
Chelsea sounds (and of course is!) posh, but the warehouse turned out to be in a rather dilapidated quarter--it was housed in one of the units at Chelsea Wharf. The area was fascinating, in fact. The old wharf buildings have been refurbished and are gradually being populated by young, trendy companies like sofa.com. But the exterior remains as it always was, I guess--raised platforms running over the mudflats of the Thames which would have been used in the past for loading goods onto the ships docked there. I love this about London -- if you're on foot and exploring, you come across the most interesting of places, just slightly off the beaten track, away from the crowds.
The warehouse was pretty good inside, too. Lofty ceilings, white painted walls, very helpful staff and lots of sofas. Just what the website boasted, in fact, and such a refreshing change from the soulless prefab units of mediocre companies like DFS.
We made our sofa choice pretty quickly, considering, and then headed off for the second leg of the day. We had tickets for 'The Glamour of Italian Fashion' exhibition at the V&A. We had a really good time there--lots of fabulous clothing to look at and videos about the history and growth of the fashion industry in Italy.
I haven't been to the V&A for a long time, and I'd forgotten how beautiful the building itself is. Exotic Victoriana at its best. Even the old loos are alluring--ornate tiles on the walls, huge ceramic basins, brass taps...
And just a final word about food. We found a lovely Italian restaurant for lunch -- Mozzarella and More on King's Road, Chelsea. Truly Italian staff and delicious Italian food. And we rounded off with tea and cake in the V&A's very own cafe, which was delicious as well.
Rather a productive day!
We'd already decided that we would order our new sofa from sofa.com. We'd seen their adverts in various publications, gone online to look at their website, and decided that this was the supplier for us. Designs and fabrics that we liked, an unfailingly good customer service ethic (even down to being prepared to take your sofa back if you decide that you don't like it once it arrives, for whatever reason), and five star reviews all round. But we didn't feel comfortable buying without seeing in the flesh, so we needed to make the trip to the sofa.com warehouse in Chelsea.
Chelsea sounds (and of course is!) posh, but the warehouse turned out to be in a rather dilapidated quarter--it was housed in one of the units at Chelsea Wharf. The area was fascinating, in fact. The old wharf buildings have been refurbished and are gradually being populated by young, trendy companies like sofa.com. But the exterior remains as it always was, I guess--raised platforms running over the mudflats of the Thames which would have been used in the past for loading goods onto the ships docked there. I love this about London -- if you're on foot and exploring, you come across the most interesting of places, just slightly off the beaten track, away from the crowds.
The warehouse was pretty good inside, too. Lofty ceilings, white painted walls, very helpful staff and lots of sofas. Just what the website boasted, in fact, and such a refreshing change from the soulless prefab units of mediocre companies like DFS.
We made our sofa choice pretty quickly, considering, and then headed off for the second leg of the day. We had tickets for 'The Glamour of Italian Fashion' exhibition at the V&A. We had a really good time there--lots of fabulous clothing to look at and videos about the history and growth of the fashion industry in Italy.
I haven't been to the V&A for a long time, and I'd forgotten how beautiful the building itself is. Exotic Victoriana at its best. Even the old loos are alluring--ornate tiles on the walls, huge ceramic basins, brass taps...
And just a final word about food. We found a lovely Italian restaurant for lunch -- Mozzarella and More on King's Road, Chelsea. Truly Italian staff and delicious Italian food. And we rounded off with tea and cake in the V&A's very own cafe, which was delicious as well.
Rather a productive day!
07 June, 2014
Love of Greece
We spent our half term in Greece. In the Peloponnese, to be precise. This is one of my husband's and my favourite places in the world. We first visited more than 20 years ago (backpacking on the buses, and moving on to a new place each day), then 10 years ago (still itinerant, but this time with suitcases and a hire car), and now with our children (staying in the same apartment for a week and with a car).
There is something simply wonderful about Greece, in my opinion. For a start, I love the ancient history. I love tramping around archaeological sites, trying to work out what was what, imagining the people alive at the time going about their business in those buildings, walking along those paths. Some of the sites are magnificent and stunningly intact, considering their vintage (the Parthenon, the theatre at Epidaurus...) but my real favourites are the tumbledown sites that are so untouristed that you often have the place entirely to yourself. And these sites are invariably in the most stunning locations.
I also love Greek food. Greek salad, souvlaki, spanakopita, tiropita.... Can't be beaten.
And there's something about the atmosphere of the place. Outside the urban bustle of Athens, the people are lovely -- very friendly, helpful and welcoming to tourists. The overwhelming feeling I have when in Greece is one of relaxation and contentment. I love it!
Luckily, the children seem to share our love of Greece. They had been wanting to visit for a while, knowing that we really liked it, and they weren't disappointed. In fact, on our return, they declared it to be one of our best ever holidays. So, I think we'll be back in another 10 years, if not before!
There is something simply wonderful about Greece, in my opinion. For a start, I love the ancient history. I love tramping around archaeological sites, trying to work out what was what, imagining the people alive at the time going about their business in those buildings, walking along those paths. Some of the sites are magnificent and stunningly intact, considering their vintage (the Parthenon, the theatre at Epidaurus...) but my real favourites are the tumbledown sites that are so untouristed that you often have the place entirely to yourself. And these sites are invariably in the most stunning locations.
I also love Greek food. Greek salad, souvlaki, spanakopita, tiropita.... Can't be beaten.
And there's something about the atmosphere of the place. Outside the urban bustle of Athens, the people are lovely -- very friendly, helpful and welcoming to tourists. The overwhelming feeling I have when in Greece is one of relaxation and contentment. I love it!
Luckily, the children seem to share our love of Greece. They had been wanting to visit for a while, knowing that we really liked it, and they weren't disappointed. In fact, on our return, they declared it to be one of our best ever holidays. So, I think we'll be back in another 10 years, if not before!
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